How to be a Better Husband and Father
While you are taking responsibility for your children and wife, it might become very difficult to understand how to balance the relationship and how to be a better husband. Remember, being a husband and a father is not a 9 to 5 job, but it is actually a complete life time work. You cannot be completely perfect at it, but all you need is to take pauses and try to better yourself.
If you are a first time father, you might be actually disturbed by the challenges you are facing as first time fathers do.
Balancing your work routine, taking responsibility for your child, helping your wife in household chores and then giving time to your toddlers can be a very tough job. All you need is to maintain a balance between all these tasks and do not let all your difficulties in time and work management frustrate you.
If you had father issues in your childhood, it is more likely you are a disturbed adult who is struggling hard to manage being a father. You need to seek professional aid and be supportive to your loved ones! Remember it is your responsibility to break the generational cycles!
7 Effective Ways to be a Better Husband and Father
Here are 7 effective tips that will help you to balance your personal and professional life along with being better towards your relationships.
1.Spend Quality Time:
What is your wife’s complaint the most?
She might be upset with you because you are not managing time for her and the family.
When you are back from work, what do you do in your relaxation time?
Are you scrolling through your phone? Or just refreshing your social media apps continuously. If you are just coming home to have dinner and sleep, then you should change your habit of scrolling. Once you enter your house, you are no longer a separate person, but a father and a husband. Make sure your wife and kids start smiling once they see you. Even if you are exhausted, do not take your frustration to your home. Smiling is the only key to avoiding frustration. Leave your hot temperament in your office. Once at home speak to your wife and children. Ask how their day went and what they are looking for the next day.
2. Bring Small Gifts on your way back to home:
Your wife and children will definitely wait for you the whole day! Once you are back from home, try not to go empty handed at home. Take flowers for your wife! You can raise your daughters’ standards by taking care of your wife in front of them! Remember young girls having father temperamental issues usually cannot figure out the difference between green flags and white flags! Try to be a man with whom you want your daughter to be in future!
Similarly by respecting your wife at home, you teach your sons how to be a gentleman to the women. Kids learn a lot by what they see!
3. Be an active listener:
It matters when you actually hear what your family says. Be an active listener when your children are narrating some absurd stories of their music teacher or sports period. Children want to be heard! When kids are left unheard, their ability to express and discuss starts degrading and they get serious communication issues later on in their life. Actively listen to your wife too!
This listening to your family will keep you involved in your family. If you try to ignore it, you will be just an earning machine for your family. And no machine can be a warm father.
4. Plan family outings:
When was the last time you went out with your kids and wife? Outings help your children and wife to spend time together. Visit historical places, art galleries or libraries. Such outings are not only encouraging but also educational. Involve your family in discussions about great artists like Van Gog and Leonardo Da Vincí. Such discussions are an amazing basis of general knowledge exchange.
5. Be Protective but not Controlling:
Dads are meant to protect families. You need to be protective for your wife and children. Especially when someone of your own family tries to humiliate your children or wife, you need to take a stand for them.
But do not be over controlling. When you start dominating your family by abusively controlling, you lose the pedestal of a good dad and husband. Prepare your children for the worst things they may encounter later on in their life. Rather than just announcing a complete no, sit with them and explain why you are not allowing them. Explain the harms of the situation and look for a solution together.
You are the real hero of your family. You need to communicate.
6. Do not make your family fear you:
If you feel like your family is fearing you, check out what the reason is.
You might be too impulsive that your wife and kids are reluctant to share their life problems with you. Either you are too loud or abusive that your explosion on small things is disturbing your children. If your reactions are too explosive, it is more likely your kids are distancing themselves from you. Be patient and calm. The world can still function if you try to be calm and think about how to react. Your kids are new to the world. Families need to be understood not to be shouted at!
7. Financial support:
Well it is the most important of all, you need to support your family financially. Financial support is necessary when it is about the kids or wife’s needs. Either your wife is a housewife or a working woman, you need to take responsibility along with your kids. Communicate openly with your wife that how will you both do your accounts together. Where which one of you needs to compromise and how understanding will help that. Such expression will maintain the family decorum.