Am I Married to a Narcissist
If you are feeling that your marriage is lacking something and things are not going as you actually thought marriages work like, it might be because you are married to a narcissist. At initial days of marriage, a narcissist might appear to be a green flag and a loving partner, however, with time you might be feeling suffocated and unhappy without knowing what is the cause of the disturbance among both of you.
It might be because your life partner is adept in loving you and making you guilty of the very minor things without you realising it. You might be worried now and thinking if you are married to a narcissist?
8 Signs You are Married to a Narcissistic Husband
Remember a narcissistic person is the hardest one to cure in psychology. They never accept that they are narcissistic and are always strongly denying a therapist’s diagnosis.
Only through signs, a narcissistic husband can be identified.
Here are some basic signs that if present in your partner, you might be married to a narcissistic person!
1. Gaslighting:
What is your reaction when you explain to your life partner one of his faults or mistakes? Imagine a situation when you actually told your spouse his/her fault and how he/she responded?
Did your life partner accuse you of not understanding? Or were you guilty after telling your spouse that it bothered you. Gaslighting is when your partner makes you doubt your own perception. Gaslighting can be disturbing when you start to notice it. If you are unable to figure it out, just observe signs and you will actually understand it.
2. Blaming:
Are you constantly thinking that whatever chaos comes in your relationship, the actual cause is just you? You should be blamed whether you are right or wrong? Have you consciously accepted that relationship mismanagement is just because of you?
Your partner is continuously degrading you and you feel like the reason behind every disturbance? If that is the reason, it is because your partner is continuously blaming you for whatever happens between you. Even if your spouse is unable to give you time, you think it is your fault that you are expecting him to come home on time. Your preferences and priorities of a married household are just “too much.”
Well then it is because your partner is continuously blaming you for everything that happens between you. This is one of the signs of the narcissists!
Your partner is more likely a narcissist!
3. Left as neglected and ignored:
Do you feel neglected and ignored most of the time? Your partner is warm towards you only when he/she is completely happy. You feel disgraced and unwanted most of the time. And when you actually complain about it, your partner starts a rapid fire and gaslights you? That is a sign of narcissism. Your partner might be very loving at one time just when he/she actually needs anything from you. While you are actually trying to work on your relationship, you think your partner has started loving you, eventually you are humiliated. This is because narcissists are most of the time using this for their own benefits. They do not care about your emotions at all.
4. Self-centred and Self-obsessed:
You might love the self-consciousness of your partner. It is more likely that you actually fall for this self-obsession trait of your partner. But with time you realise that self-obsession is so intense that you do not exist anywhere near your partner. Your partner only cares about his/her own needs and actually bothers you nowhere. Your partner’s centre of attention is his /her own being. They care about their social circle, reputation in surroundings, workload and what they actually want. You are just a secondary person who is there for little or no reason. This is the extreme form of self-consciousness that is a very bright hallmark of narcissism.
5. Controlling:
It might have happened many times in your relationship with your partner that you are being constantly controlled. You have little or no control on your own life. It feels like suffocation. It might be obvious that you cannot go for a walk, make friends or even buy yourself anything. It is common when narcissistic partners ask for the mobile pin and social media handles, and constantly criticise you for every small move. They might call it a safety check, or necessary for protection. Sometimes you might be loving it too, calling it over possessiveness or protecting your partner. But with time you realise you are just an invisible jail.
6. Superiority Complex:
Your partner might be in an undefined superiority complex. You would be taking it as a sign of self-awareness in the beginning but later on it would be disturbing, especially excess of it. A little praise might show their arrogance and the sense of being above all. This disturbance began when the superiority complex started disgracing you. You might feel inferior or the other person would start considering you inferior evenly.
7. Isolation:
Do you feel like your partner is isolating you from your surroundings? You are isolating, and disturbed by that but just because your life partner does not like your socialising with your family, you keep yourself feeling low. This isolation is just to make you feel lonely. You might feel that your partner wants you to be under control of him only. This is a threat to your independence and mental peace. It’s more likely your partner is a narcissist.
8. Threatening:
Does your partner threaten you for leaving you alone? It might be because your partner thinks you are emotionally, physically and financially dependent on you. And definitely you are not going to leave him. This behaviour is of a narcissist, who needs a slave kind of relationship to use and disgrace. Such partners are expecting you to never leave them and in actuality they need you to dominate. Narcissists never accept their controlling behaviour.