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How to be a Good Step Parent

Have you decided to be a part of a family as a Good Step parent? Do you think you are able to choose a life partner who already has kids from a previous relationship and you are worried about how to take care of your life partner and your step children within boundaries?

Well you are at the right place!

Ways to be a Good Step Parent

Here are 6 effective measures you can take to be a good step parent!

Good Step Parent

1. Celebrate occasions as a family:

Occasions need to be celebrated as a family. Stop considering yourself an outer member now. Try to remember your step kid’s date of birth, graduation, and other events. Deep inside your kids are deprived of a relationship with a parent, the place of whom you are occupying. Try to fill in the gap by being nice and warm and celebrate occasions more warmly like a family. Plan small surprises with your wife, or husband.

Try to surprise your spouse by making plans with your step children. By this way you would be spending quality time together with your step children, more likely developing an understanding with them. Help them in making assignments or drive them to school. Your presence in their life will be a pleasant addition.

2. Do not stop your children meeting with their own parent:

If you are a step mom or step dad, do not be extraordinary in controlling their lives. If they are meeting their actual mom or dad, your partner’s ex, do not be frustrated by it. You cannot deny natural relationships and cannot make your step children un-love their actual parents. Be acceptable and do not inquire a lot. Accept and live a normal life without an extra controlling attitude. Try to be flexible and accept the facts. Similarly, do not be frustrated when your current partner meets his/her ex for the decisions of kids matter. Support your family and do not let anything or anyone spoil your bond with your family.

3. Set Boundaries with your Spouse:

 portrait of an young affectionate mixed race couple

A Good Step Parent set boundaries before completely involving in the relationship. It is ok if you are disturbed a bit by small things like involvement of your step kids in your life. Highlight your boundaries before you are going to develop an interaction with them. Accept them as your small fellows. You are their step mom and step dad, but besides that you are a life partner to their parents as well. Limit your boundaries and be a cooperative step parent.

First of all you need to examine the nature of your step children’s attitude. If they are friendly, you can be a joyful step-parent. However if your step kids are shy, reserved, and do not want you to interrupt their life, you can design your boundaries according to that. Imagine yourself at their place, it might be difficult for them to accept a completely new person in place of their father or mother. Give them some time. Your interaction and care within a boundary will definitely prove effective with time.

4. Communicate when anything bothers you:

Communication is necessary when working like a family. Remember do not be worried when things are getting out of your hands, every family is unique and has a different set of rules. Accept your faults when necessary and do not hesitate to communicate in a normal tone. For example, on your dinner table you can speak like , “ I hope you all had a good day, I just want to mention that I am having a headache since morning, please can you all turn the volume of television slow when I am in the be” . Small phrases like this can add beauty in your interactions and will make others understand your needs.

5. Share Responsibilities with your partner:

husband holding wife's hand

When you decide for a relationship, you need to be able to take responsibilities as well. Once you are a part of a family, share your responsibilities with your spouse. Either it is financial assistance or help in household chores. Offer a helping hand. You are not in a relationship until you own the relationship. If your partner is having the responsibilities of kids, definitely your partner might be under responsibilities and pressure of financial clearance. You are now part of the family, you should contribute as a team and be there to share the situation when needed.

6. Plan “alone time” with your step children:

father and step child having alone time

That is when you actually are serious about deciding anything with your child. This alone time is necessary for you with your kids. Take your children for a walk or a small trip. Ask them to join you to the gym, or your step daughters for some girl shopping. Once you gain a bit of closeness, ask your children what you can do to make your relationship better with them. Explain to them how you want to help them and what are your safety measures for the family. You need to initiate the conversations Explain and grow together. Tell them how to approach you and ask for help. Some help for them.

Things you should Speak your Step Children About:

You can speak to your step children like:

  • “It’s completely normal whatever happened to your parents in the past, and I cannot completely change it, but I want to bring positive changes in our family…”
  • “Your mummy (or daddy) is a lot worried about how we as this step relationship gonna make it, I want her/him to be relieved by our relationship.”
  • “I am not here to replace your real father (or mother). I just want us to be friends. I am sorry for whatever you went through, all I can say is, I am always there when you need me, as a friend, as a parent or as an important person to your real mother.”
  • “Do not be afraid of me, I am not going to play the part of Cinderella’s horrible mommy in your life. Let me know if you need a helping hand. I will always be there!”

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